


In sleep, I trust in you

by mariasue123



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-20
Updated: 2016-08-20
Packaged: 2018-08-09 23:54:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,364
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7822162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mariasue123/pseuds/mariasue123
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"Arthur knew that the worst came at night"</p><p> </p><p>*notes at the end*</p>
            </blockquote>





	In sleep, I trust in you

Arthur Kirkland knew that the worst came at night.

He thought that the person sleeping beside him now should have made him feel safer, but the truth was that it just aggravated him even more. Not that he’d ever tell Alfred that.

He lay there and forced his breath to keep slow and even, to not disturb the sleeping younger nation. He tried to ignore the sweat on his back, on his hands that were red after gripping the sheets so tightly, and tried to not think of what he had just relived in the deep pit of his nightmares. Fortunately this time it was much shorter and he couldn’t remember everything, just a horrible darkness and a rush of panic that had woken him up. But he still had to almost bite his tongue to stop himself from crying out into the night. Still woke with the old fear that when he woke up, Alfred would be gone, that he too had only ever been part of his dreams. He wanted so badly to wake Alfred up, to seek reassurance, to be comforted but he would not. It would be far more than he deserved. Frankly, he still counted it as a miracle that Alfred had noticed him, that he chosen to stay with him, even after all this time. He had no desire to trouble Alfred any further.

Even so, the loneliness of his nightmares ate away at him, especially in the small hours of the night. He lay there, watching passing lights from outside cast shadows on his lover’s back. His arm reached out ever so slightly. But he did not touch Alfred.  
Instead, he chose to focus on the blonde boy sleeping next to him, his back turned towards Arthur and sleeping like a log. Arthur fancied he'd almost heard him snoring gently. It was so fucking adorable Arthur thought. Sometimes the child in Alfred was almost evident.  
And yet… Arthur looked at the broad back that rose and fell as Alfred's chest heaved steadily in his sleep. Since when had his back been so wide, so man-like? And his arms seemed so strong; Arthur could practically see the muscles bulging from under the sheets. Alfred could now (and had done on several occasions, in spite of his futile protests) easily hoist him up in his arms if he wanted to. When had that happened? And his impossibly blue eyes that made him feel like he was drowning, drowning in that calm blue ocean and-

_The sky was a muddy blue above that grim battlefield. He had called out for his men but they were not there, only him and the Other. They were staring at each other now and then he was holding something. A gun, the weight of it humming in his hand. They both had guns now, facing each other, seeing so much depravity in each other’s eyes. And there was blood. So much blood. Was it his or Alfred’s? Red on his hands, oh god please don’t leave me, please don’t go, without you I can’t, all of it is just-_

_Pointless._ It was just pointless to think about it.

Arthur's eyes flew open again. He shook his head, burying the (dream? Memory? what?) in the back of his mind. He tried to refocus on Alfred, on the steady breathing, the calm blue and the arms that would carry him safely if he wanted them to. He felt his self-control slipping. Surely, he thought, it would be alright to just move closer, just a little bit.  
He inched forward, ruffling the bed sheets ever so slightly. He could faintly make out Alfred’s familiar smell, like coffee and coke and a slight, masculine scent of sweat. He moved forwards even more, until he ended up touching Alfred’s back.

The familiar sight of stripes and stars temporarily erased Arthur’s past horrors from his mind, as he found himself burying his face in Alfred’s back, basking in the warmth of the solidness and fabric infused with Alfred’s scent on his skin. He ran slim fingers through his tousled blonde hair, allowing himself to feel Alfred, that he was here with him and safe. All the while obscure half-thoughts that, partially due to his drowsiness, came trailing into to his mind that he would never dare say out loud. So beautiful, he thought, my Alfred, Alfred is all mine…stupid bloody...what in God’s name am I doing… and does he have to be so beautiful it hurts… He sighed half-heartedly, contently getting lost in his gentle touching. And suddenly, there was hitch in the breathing and a deafening creak of the mattress as Alfred turned over and he found himself flinching as he came face to face with his startlingly blue eyes, so, so close to his face.

“Arthur, what the hell? It's like 2:00 in the morning.. I know you're like super-perveted but-"

“What?! D-don’t get the bloody wrong idea! I was not… doing anything. I just couldn’t sleep, is all.

"Seriously? Do you have a fever or something?"

He inched closer, to touch Arthur’s forehead with his own. And Arthur thought his cheeks couldn’t get any more red. He slowly shifted away from Alfred’s irritatingly soft, sweet blue gaze and turned his back on him, trying to not let Alfred see how flustered he was. His pride would never allow it.  
“Of course I don’t have a fever. I’m fine. There’s nothing wrong so you can go back to sleep.”

“But Arthur, dude you’re shaking.”  
  
“I told you I’m fine. We have a meeting tomorrow so just - gah! “

Arthur’s breathed out a gasp of surprise as the younger man rolled him over so that he was back facing Alfred’s unwavering gaze. Arthur made a halph-hazard pass at cuffing the side of Alfred's head while almost shouting.

“What in the hell do you think you’re doing? I don’t want to be bloody man-handled by you in bed!

Alfred decided to brave through Arthur’s indignation and took the small, irritable man’s hands in his own and smiled softly. Though still flustered, Arthur huffed and relented, allowing the younger nation to press his lips to his forehead.

“I heard you talkin’ in your sleep.” he whispered softly.

Arthur’s eyes widened. No, _no had he heard…_

“You weren't loud or anything but uh, you sounded pretty scared."

“What? That, I…” Arthur stuttered, trying to find the right words, excuses, anything to explain away the cold, empty part of him that Alfred had discovered.

“Arthur,you know I love you right?" Though it was dark, Arthur could practically see Alfred blushing and subsequently felt himself go red.  
  
Alfred continued "So, if there's something wrong, basically you don't need to stress out about it because I promise I'll beat them up for you! You know... 'cause I love you."  
  
For a second Arthur was speechless, his heart, now beating rapidly in his chest. Alfred's words had made Arthur so happy, but there would always be a cynical part of him that doubted the solidness of that promise. They were countries, after all, anything could happen.

But still, joy and drowsiness overrid his worries as he cupped Alfred's cheek and smiled, half-happy and half amused and promptly replied:

"Yeah, I love you too, you git. Now go to sleep."

He turned over for the last time, expecting Alfred to finally leave him alone and go to sleep, when he felt a warm body pressing at his back and strong hands wrapping around his waist very gently.

Behind him, Alfred whispered "Is it alright if it's like this?" I think it'll help you sleep better. Also, I just...wanna hold you."

Arthur chuckled and responded by craning his neck round to kiss Alfred's forehead before comfortably snuggling into his embrace, thinking that like this, he just might be able to sleep undisturbed after all.

"I'll allow it. G'night Alfred." He yawned and closed his eyes, chucking slightly as Alfred had already gone back to snoring.

It turned out to be one of the best nights of sleep he'd ever had. And one of many, many more that all happened to coincide with Alfred's presence.

**Author's Note:**

> I apologise for not updating in a while but since going on holiday my access to the internet has been severely limited. In the mean time, here's this little ficlet that I wrote at three in the morning to amuse you. I don't think it's any good but I also doubt I can improve it so oh well.
> 
> Also my dear beta reader (brother) has commented that my writing style can come across as too informal, insincere and stand-offish thus putting the reader off. If this is so, I truly apologise but I am working hard to improve.
> 
> Comments and critisms are appreciated!


End file.
